When I was a young boy, I was restless like others of that age, eager to grow up and be independent. We wanted freedom; we wanted to break free and not be constantly told what to do by parents, teachers, siblings, and all other elders.
Childhood was bliss, and reasons for joy were in abundance. There was nothing that was not worth celebrating, and we particularly looked forward to the festivals. The festive season started with Saraswati Puja in February and ended with Christmas and New Year in December. The days would pass counting down from one celebration to the next. All in all, it was about chasing the next event in the calendar and enjoying life throughout.
As the numbers in the calendar kept changing, we continued to add years to our age, and life began to feel different. Life became front-loaded with responsibilities as we stopped growing up and started to grow old instead. Those dark hairs now got transformed into a combination of salt and pepper. It’s only a matter of time before they turn to salt alone.
Today, as we approach the October of the wheel of our life, we continue to chase days—but now they are the days between one weekend and the next. There is hardly a moment to pause and look around in this journey.
The days always pass at the same pace, but sometimes they appear longer than others, and 2015 is one such example of a long year. This year has been a cruel reminder of a simple truth of our existence—we are mere mortals, with a definitive beginning and an end. Scientists may be working towards “curing death,” but that remains a distant reality for people like us.
For the past few years, the world has been dogged by conflicts and has lost many lives due to avoidable wars in the Middle East, man-made disasters, natural calamities, and natural causes. We have also lost, in 2015, more than our fair share of lives that touched many beyond their immediate families.
On a personal level, I have lost two very dear friends and a few relatives. Both my friends were on the other side of forty. As in The God of Small Things, they were “Not old. Not young. But a viable die-able age.” I have learnt that each day above ground is a celebration and not to be wasted by grumbling or whining about haves and have-nots.
This has been a life-changing experience for me, creating mayhem within my inner self. I felt extreme grief and was distracted by the thought of how everything could change for a person or a family within moments. It is difficult to explain—perhaps just the vagaries of twenty fifteen.
I would be naïve to imply that there has been no positivity or achievement this year, as there has been plenty. But for me, the weight of loss has overshadowed it all. So perhaps this year needs to end sooner rather than later, for it has been unquestionably fierce—but not fast enough.
Some years are difficult. These days it seems very frequent that men who are just about 40 or even younger are passing away suddenly. Accidents, increased stress levels and a very abruptly changing lifestyle could be blamed and in Darwinian terms we can say its part of the evolution process.
ReplyDeleteWe continue to mourn and also to love.
Very true... Stress along with lack of adequate rest and unhealthy eating is having a huge impact.
ReplyDeleteLovely post..
ReplyDeleteSome years are difficult. These days it seems very frequent that men who are just about 40 or even younger are passing away suddenly. Accidents, increased stress levels and a very abruptly changing lifestyle could be blamed and in Darwinian terms we can say its part of the evolution process.
ReplyDeleteWe continue to mourn and also to love.
Try remaining positive & hope that your 2016 will bring in more happiness!
And congrats on getting the WOW badge!
When we take a stock of life, particularly in context of tragic or undesirable events at a personal or general level, sometimes the futility certain things dawn upon us. But we have to keep going while maintaining sanity, and for that a positive frame of mind is very much needed. Hope for a better tomorrow.
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